When we got back to Maryland my husband and I went to the ER thinking I’d really messed my back up. I couldn’t sit at the piano anymore (I’m a pianist/organist). I could barely walk. I couldn’t get into bed without help. And once in bed, I couldn’t roll over. The doctor asked what I’d done to hurt my back, and I told her about our trip. She said she thought it was muscular, but an x-ray was called for.

It was Miserable, just miserable, trying to lie down on that cold, hard, metal table I waited while the x-rays were read.

“Not good news I’m afraid,” the doctor said, looking up from the x-rays she had clipped on a light table.  You have a broken back.

I was stunned.  I knew the trip had been painful, but a broken back?  How? When? Was I going to have to have surgery?  All these questions were swirling in my brain. Oh how little did I know about what was in store for me.

The doctor was great. She showed us the x-ray and said that I’d have to have an MRI so they could get a close-up picture and then I was to take that MRI to my appointment with the spine doctor. She relieved some of my anxiety by explaining that most likely they would be able to put a cement-like substance in my back to stabilize it that I would be free from the pain.

At the time I had severe pain in my hip, too, but I didn’t mention it because I thought it was from all the effort I was putting into keeping my back from hurting.

I remember the day we set off to get my MRI I was happy that soon I would get some relief from this excruciating back-pain but first I had to go through lying  down on a cold, hard, metal table. It hurt so bad. I remember gritting my teeth as the pain seared through my body and the MRI scanner deafened me with its noise. All while I squeezed into a tube like so much toothpaste. It was not a pleasant experience.

I was glad to get home and try to rest, but the pain didn’t allow for much of that.  Just as I was getting as close to comfortable as I could the phone let out a jarring ring.  I was surprised to see it was the Doctor calling.  So soon?

“Is this Mrs. Jackson, ” she said?

“Yes,” I replied a bit cautiously.

“Mrs. Jackson,” I’m sorry to have to tell you this—oh no, I though, here it comes, surgery.  “Mrs. Jackson, are you there?  I realized I’d not been listening to her.

“yes, I’m here,” I replied.

“Mrs. Jackson, I’m afraid I have some bad news.  We found bone lesions along your spine and on your ribs.”

“Bone lesions,” I interrupted, “Bone lesions? What does that mean?”

“Mrs. Jackson, I’m afraid you have cancer”

My life was about to change forever